kristal unggu

LOSING MY MOM

I was in Jakarta when the phone call came at around 10.00 pm on a Tuesday night May 13th. Mom has passed away.

In a way, I have been prepared for it for a long time. We have given her our best. She has been sick for a long time bed ridden. And I couldn't bear to see her go on. In fact quietly, I wanted her sufferings to end. And death is the kindest thing that God has created for all of us for such an instance.

Prior to receiveing the news, I was suddenly so exhausted. Thought I was going to die in a hotel room, alone in Jakarta. After the news, I couldn't sleep until around 4.30am. I was battling with the reponsibilty of going back immediately the following morning or stay on until Friday morning as planned.

Calculating departure time in Soekarno Hatta airport and arrival time at my hometown in Pahang, Malaysia, it was just next to impossible of arriving in time for burial.

As painful as it was, I had to sound as calm as possible advising my uncle and brother that they should go on the funeral less me. As a Muslim, it was very imperative the body be buried as soon as possible upon demise. It was phone call after phone call back home monitoring what was happening thousand of kilometres away back home.

So, what is it like to have lost my mother? I couldn't stop my silent tears while attempting breakfast in a corner of the hotel restaurant the following morning. Told my colleague back home in KL, no work for me that day in honour of my mother. I didn't have any more energy left in me.

I went to meet Yani my adopted sister in Jakarta. She did all she could to help me cope up with the situation. I was just so lost and empty at that point of time. Then went back to my hotel room again. Alone. Cut off all business calls. I just needed to be alone.

To all my friends who have been so kind to extend me their condolences, I thank you all right from the bottom of my heart. It definitely helped me eased the pain.

Now, it has been 2 weeks since my mom is gone. The actual mourning is about to begin as memories of those years of having her starts to trickle into my mind. I lost my dad about 7 years ago. I still miss him.

To all of you who are still blessed with your parents, appreciate them. Do what ever you can do for the day will come when you will have to lose them.

I have lost both and I know what I am talking about.

If you are a Muslim, will appreciate it greatly if you could kindly recite the Al-Fatehah for my late mom.

For the rest of you, thank you very much for sharing my grief.

Yours truly,

Muhamad Abdullah.
K.L.

PROLOGUE:

Munirah turns 23 today.
22nd January, 2008.

Happy Birthday daughter!

I know you'll definitely live life to the fullest, being the best in what ever you do. To me, you shall always remain the little baby that I helped your mummy deliver 23 years ago.

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Now, do you believe me, when I said she is still a 'baby'?

ABOUT FRIENDS

This is about my 2 friends in Bangalore, India and Brisbane, Australia. Continents apart. As different as curry and cheese. Couldn't be more different than that. But as I look closer, life transcends all geographical or whatever differences imagined or real. Both are successful, great and living life as it should be, in a close knitted family.

Mr Navin Kini from Bangalore...

Left: Mr Navin Kini. Lady in black, Namrata his daughter.

Mr Navin Kini from Bangalore is a successful entrepreneur owns a telecommunication company operating in 30+ countries. Not so sure of the exact figures. He also owns a manufacturing company.

He has 2 daughters, both married. Both residing in the US when I was last told. Also very successful and very pretty. Both married to great husbands.

Page 3 Celebrities

This family appeared in one of the newspapers in Bangalore, India, for being who is who in the local society attending a function organised by Namrata, his daughter.

Jyotsna back visiting from San Francisco

The other family is way down under in Brisbane. The Noakes. They are our family friends for quite some time now. John and Rob are in property, buying, renovating and selling houses for some handsome profits. John also has his own MLM company back in Australia. By my yardstick, a wealthy couple but one of the most humble couple I have ever known in my life.

Here are some of the pictures sent to me taken over last Xmas.

The 3 generations of Noakes preparing for Xmas

Flynn ( Megan's son), Megan (John's daughter), John's mom, John and Caleb (Megan's son).

Rob and little John Henry

Big Boss coaching Little Boss becoming a future F1 driver

John with Little John Henry, John's mom, Jason and Tex. All 4 generations of the Noakes Dynasty!

And , we are blessed to have them all as our friends.
Lots of love,

Yours truly,

m.a.
KL.
22nd January 2008.

The great people who were there for Mary...

It was a relatively private and low key affair being the akad nikah confined to a very select few friends and family members of both bride and groom at the Desa Tasek mosque earlier today.

But what made it so memorable was the presence of friends on Mary's side.

To all of Mary's friends, just email me in case you need to have more photos of Mary's wedding at: muhdabdullah@gmail.com.

Warmest Regards,

m.a.

Selamat Pengantin Baru!

The Bride and Groom

This was an akad nikah of a different kind that made the whole affair so special, at least the way my heart saw it. Even though it was just an akad nikah held at the Desa Tasek mosque minus the usual big kenduri that would normally followed, but it was the way it all went that's worth putting on record.

Mary and Nas 4 days before their wedding. Sunday 6th January 2008. Met them at Semua House. Their akad nikah was on Thursday 10th January 2008.

Mary an Eurasian, the only kid in the family, is a convert. So unlike the normal akad nikah full of family and relatives presence, hers was obviously without all those people. For what ever reasons, none of her relatives were there apart from her parents.

But friends were determined to make her wedding as great as it could be.

The friends...

The friends who took all the trouble.. Iqbal was there too..

The night before the wedding, Husna, Nirah and Siti were at Mary's home helping her with all the necessary business of getting married the following day. Well, it would be the same with the normal Malay wedding.

Nirah and Husna. Wonder why they both look anything but Chinese?

Here comes The Princess of the Moment..

Whoa! So very, very pretty 'maids' all in a row with the hantaran (gifts)

The Hantaran (Gifts)

Is that Ira, Mary and Siti?

And they even had the berinai session ( decorative motifs using henna on the hands and fingers). That was also the normal stuff that we used to have at the kampung weddings ever since.

Berinai

Apart from our Nirah who has been Mary's close friend since her primary school days in Mentakab, Husna and Siti are friends she met while working in KL.

Ross makan kenduri...

Of course, where there was Nirah, Ross would also be around and for a very special reason too. When Ross just got a job in KL, (he is from JB), Mary was kind enough to let Ross stayed with her for 2 months or so. And it was really great to see Nirah's friends both Malcom and Iqbal to have come along to cheer things up for Mary.

The Mom and the Emak Angkat (Adopted Mom)

Being Nirah's parents, we were both obligated to do our part for Mary whom we have since 'adopted'. We really would like to make it as happening as it should be for Mary.

We are proud of this young lady. She has in her own ways made a life for herself by getting herself a job and buying herself a car and a house almost immediately here in KL. And she got both her parents to move in with her from Mentakab.

And to friends like Husna, Siti and the rest, I couldn't help but feeling touched by the presence of these great people who were there for Mary to be with her on a very special day of her life, making it a very memorable one.

That is Siti adjusting a friend's tudung (head scarf)

And Malcolm was there too...

Mary and her Ladies in Attendance, Ira(?) and Nirah

The final moments of a single lady's life...

A man is not complete until he gets married.....

And the heart must have been bedeboom, bedeboom...waiting to become a 'wife'..

Finally... the akad nikah (Saying I do the Muslim way)

"Heheh heh... Me a married woman now... Yabedoo bedooo...
Now got husband to order around... Heheh heh...."

And 'Baby' the Cat 'was there' too witnessing the akad nikah...

A man is never complete until he gets married. And when a man gets married, he is COMPLETELY FINISHED! Don't believe? Ask all the married men! Of course we wouldn't tell you. Who is going to marry our daughters and sisters and nieces then????

Friends saying the prayers after the akad nikah.

Away from the pack, but saying the prayers for Mary too..

Isteri yang solehah...

"You are MINE!"

To Nas, even though we hardly knew you, we wish you and Mary the best of everything in your future life as husband and wife. May you guys be blessed with happiness,prosperity, good health and lots of kids! There'll be lots of challenges along the way, but stay together through good and bad times and make the marriage happen for good.

My beloved wife...

"Mummy. I am now some body's wife.. OK?"

I want all of you to know that we all love you guys, Mary and Nas, Husna, Siti, Nirah, Ross, Malcom, Iqbal and the rest of Mary's friends who were so beautiful to be there, to be part of the momentous occasion. Really appreciate your presence.

"Oh Mummy..." And so the mum-in-law's heart melted away.. NAS SO PANDAI!

Pengantin Baru and Friends

Friends and family members on both sides

Some more friends..

Kawan-Kawan...

Pengantin Baru and Pengantin Baru-Baru..

To Mary's parents, we are sure with the presence of Nas, life is now almost complete. But it shall only be complete with the presence of your grandchildren...

NOTE TO ALL PRESENT AT THE AKAD NIKAH
To all the great people out there who made it happened for Mary, please feel free to copy and save the pictures. Kindly forward me pictures any of you guys took at the akad nikah. Email me at: muhdabdullah@gmail.com.